Sep 2, 2021Maybe He’ll ChangeI lay sprawled on the kitchen floor with no more tears left to cry. Hours I had just laid there, crying. The kitchen being the farthest room from my daughter's, it was the one place I could let it all out while she slept soundly in her bed. To her…Journal5 min read
Aug 31, 2021I Am Going To Die AloneI know no one is going to read this- nor no one will care to read this. It doesn’t bother me. In fact- nothing bothers me anymore. Opinions, arguments, debates, politics, people- they all stand in this cesspool of toxicity while I am just… here. I’m finally ok with that. No Personal Social Media …Romance3 min read
Published in Addiction Unseen·Dec 4, 2020How I Self-Tapered off MethadoneMethadone was my Liquid Handcuffs — Every morning around 5 am, I would wake up in sweats. Feeling my knee and ankle pain creep deep into the depths of my bones. I need to dose. I’d ache as I moved to get up, pack the kids and load the vehicle, drive 20 minutes to the nearest…Methadone7 min read
Dec 2, 2020I Fell in Love With A Nameless Man OnlineThere’s a line when social media becomes more than just a form of communication with people you have in real life. Clicking likes, trends, following accounts you share views with suddenly becomes knowing an entire person behind the account for years without actually knowing who the person is. January/February 2020…Online Dating3 min read
Nov 29, 2020“I Feel Like a Bad Mom… Oh Shoot, Please Don’t Write That Down”Katie sat in my huge arm chair, tears flooding down her cheeks. She hadn’t relapsed, but DHHS was once involved in her children’s lives. Three years ago Katie came into the program as a last resort. DHHS told her they would not even consider a reunification plan with her children…Addiction3 min read
Nov 21, 2020Her Great-Great-Granddad: A Slave Owner. Mine, Fled HitlerAround 4am, the rush was finally over. My coworker and I walked outside and sat leaning against the restaurant wall as we do every night after the rush. …Racism6 min read
Nov 11, 2020COVID-19, Mental Health, & Substance Abuse: How has this Pandemic Affected You?In March 2020, much of the United States (and world) locked down. COVID-19 swept through the globe. Schools shut down. All non-essential businesses closed until further notice. Ques became a normal way of life. Fathers were no longer able to be with mothers giving birth to their children. States of…Substance Abuse3 min read
Nov 10, 2020Schizophrenia Misunderstood: The Unwanted PopulationStanding at 6'4'’, Luther Vay would intimidate most. Aged from life on the streets, Luther was painted in viking tattoos and often would be seen marching up and down the streets screaming. His booming voice would echo against the brick buildings and most chalked him up to be the local…Schizophrenia5 min read
Aug 3, 2020Why Soup Kitchens Don’t Have To Be “Soup Kitchens”When someone hears the reference of “soup kitchen” a stigma is often associated. Images flood one’s head of long lines of poverty standing with bags waiting to get through the door, the jail-like trays, plastic-ware, and low-quality food slopped onto these trays. Do you know what I think of when…The Future Is Now3 min read
Aug 3, 2020Our Daughter’s Birthday Preparations Included Writing His ObituaryPeaking in the rear-view mirror, the little one was fast asleep clutching onto her blanket. An hour and forty-five minute drive for one 30-minute supervised visit seemed outlandish, but I had hoped these supervised visits would spark a want and need to stay sober. Last Christmas, I had brought her…Addiction7 min read
